Well it seems to be the Christmas season. At least that is all I am seeing on TV commercials and hearing on the radio now. Even the Christmas Carols have started. I imagine all the stores are set up for Christmas and the Christmas muzak is playing in the elevators!
I usually love Christmas. I don't really like the shopping, but always look forward to the season. Visiting and entertaining. Shop windows all dressed up and Salvation Army Buckets and Bells to help the poor. The big day, starting with a Christmas breakfast and the smell of the turkey cooking and the kids (now grand kids) playing with all the new things they received from family and friends!
Unfortunately that all belongs to the Land of the Employed. I don't think I have ever been totally unemployed at Christmas before. I have been employed at jobs that were low on the pay scale or part time in my younger years but never entirely unemployed. I find this to be really depressing when money issues are so upfront and center at Christmas time. I have been plugging along so far, pinching and scrounging, thinking I am doing the right thing by waiting to see if the funding comes through for college. Unfortunately I am unable to do the type of physical work I have done in the past. Being a paramedic and rescue personnel have destroyed my back. I am almost guaranteed the funding by the sounds of things but won't know until February. Now though I am re-thinking this.
So I am finding that I can't "do" Christmas. I am miserable. I can't entertain so I don't want to visit. I can't shop as I don't have the money. I have to tell everyone to please not buy for me as I cannot reciprocate. I don't want to hear the Christmas Carols or see the advertisements or watch any Christmas shows. The Christmas Spirit has been taken out of my Christmas. The Grinch has once again stolen Christmas. Like it or not, Christmas costs us dearly.
So, I feel awful as I am going to disappoint the grand kids this year. I have no Christmas cheer to spread so I already feel I am going to be lousy company. All because of our crappy economy. Caused by the greed of money hungry individuals, institutions and banks. The ones that already had hordes of money. Modern day Grinch's! I am one of the so called "Victims of the Recession".
So this is why I am re-thinking my position. I had worked my way up and it took years. Divorced single Mom, two children to raise but I did it and made my way up in the world to where I and my family were comfortable. All gone now.
Maybe I should give up the dream and take what ever job I can get so I can make ends meet. I don't know. Can I settle for a job instead of a career? Again I don't know. What I do know is that if I chose that, there is no going back!
Do you want to attend a college or work at a college? Presents are not the main event for Christmas at our house...I'm sure your friends and family will certainly understand if you can't do presents this year. Is there any seasonal work you could pick up for the few weeks around Christmas? That way you could still be available for February. I sure hope things work out.
Hi Lori! I want to attend college. Web Design and Development. I have been looking for some seasonal work to help out. Thanks for the kind words. I know gifts are not everything, but still hate to show up at Christmas empty handed!
I know it's tough because I've been where you are. I found that baking breads or cookies for gifts made me feel a lot better about the holidays. I do hope you find your way soon.
The most important gift is yourself. No matter what the "world" says. This could be a very burden free Christmas. Remember whose birthday it is. Famous words. Children can survive without another toy. Give something of yourself. Look around your house for a funny different kind of gift or give them something they have admired. Enjoy the hooplah without spending money. Watch your movies. Enjoy the decorations at the mall. I like to sometimes think what can I do for free. Take the grandchildren on a nature walk. Do a craft. Give everyone a made up coupon "time with Mom". I wish I could encourage you in person. List what you have, not what you have lost or do not have.
My heart goes out to you about the job. Do whatever you feel is right. You can always make another change if need be.
DF
I think Christmas will be lean in many homes this year. I feel your pain.
Thanks Betty. I think taking along some baked goods is a great idea!At least you are not coming empty handed.
Ms. Fiddlesticks, you are right I know. I will try to look differently at this. You have given some good suggestions!
EG, I believe you are right. Damn those Christmas Grinch's!
I hear ya! Do I take "any old job" to pay some bills and give up for now on a job I really want? It's a tough choice. Practically speaking, any old job makes monetary sense - but if it crushes your spirit I'm not sure the reward is worth it! I have been there.
I'm still rooting for you. Hugs!
F&S - So true. It is a hard choice right now. The college course will see me into my retirement years with the information I learn. I was thinking it would be my final career!